i tried to love him
tried to tie it around his neck,
stuff it deep in his pockets,
and told myself that,
he’d carry it around with him…
promised myself that it’d be enough
but…. it didn’t work…
plan aborted… access denied…mission unsuccessful…
it didn’t work….
but i wanted it too, i needed it too…
he didn’t always understand me but somehow i fascinated him, and somehow i intrigued him into loving me because my affection was innocent… i loved without conditions or return…i loved the man he was, and the man he wanted to be…i loved him when he had nothing to give and everything to gain….for these reasons he loved me but…
couldn’t sustain, couldn’t fight,
didn’t know what was at stake,
with temptation invading,
there was no fail-safe, no life jacket…
so we sank, drifted, and sank some more…
somehow i managed to find the find the surface, managed to collect some of the debris, and cast away the forsaken memories…comforting myself with possibilities of resuscitating what died in his arms,
drifting…
floating…
into oblivion.
